Since we already talked about 10 Reasons to Have a Big Family, today we are going to talk about reasons you should NOT have a big family. I’ve heard them all!
Please keep in mind that this is a rather tongue in cheek style post. I realize that big family life is not for everyone, and each family must decide what is best for them. But… when you have a large family, you hear these comments rather often. Amirite?
Here are 6 Reasons You Should Not Have a Big Family
Groceries are expensive.
I mean, moderate food costs for a family of 4 are $239 per week. Just imagine if you had to double that! That is, unless you live in an area with a lower cost of living. Or you are careful in how you spend your grocery money in wants versus needs. Or you could be creative in finding different ways to feed a larger family. Sometimes we even tell the kids that they don’t need a snack right now, because they are probably actually only thirsty. (gasp!)
Activities are expensive.
The cost of dance lessons/memberships/experiences are pricey enough with my two children. I could never afford to pay for them across more children, and I don’t want kids to miss out on these experiences. Although, with more siblings, they already manage to stay pretty busy playing with one another. And while child #1 loves music lessons (for instance), the other kids find them pretty dull. So it turns out that we didn’t need to pay for them x 5 after all anyway!
Overpopulation stuff!
I couldn’t add to the overpopulation problem. Did you know that in truth, we are not even having enough babies to replace ourselves? There are countries begging families with incentives to have more children. You can look it up yourself, but there are a couple of articles here and here. I also really recommend this book.
Car space.
There is no more room in the car. The car seats already take up all of the room and I am unwilling to compromise safety. I totally agree with you on this one! It’s high time the automobile industry addresses this problem! Make enough room across your backseat to easily accommodate 3 bulky car seats, and make it standard across all family vehicles. Can you hear me, Ford?
But it is possible to get creative with finding a larger vehicle. We can buy a used mini van for the price of a new sedan. Although yes, your gas costs will certainly increase. Keep in mind that your kids will not be in car seats forever, and if the kids are spaced far enough apart that may cease to be a problem.
I’m not perfect!
I just don’t have the patience. You must be a saint. hahahahaha!! Far from a saint! There are many days that we just have “too many kids”. But I’ve learned that the trade off for dealing with the chaos is a lot of love, plus the bonus of getting to have amazing new people in your life for as long as God loans them to you. Which is pretty darned awesome.
Peer pressure.
What will people think? The thing is, no matter what you do or don’t do, people are going to talk about you. And they will ask you all manners of rude questions.
- “Why don’t you have kids?”
- “When will you have another? He can’t be an only child!”
- “Oh no, another boy. Going to try for a girl, huh?”
- “Oh great, you got your girl. Now you’re done.”
- “What?? Another child?? Why would you have another child when you already have boys and a girl?”
- “Now every time you talk we are afraid you are going to announce another pregnancy, and we can’t handle that.”
Here’s the thing…unless the other person pays your bills, it is absolutely none of their business. Make your family happy.
What reasons you should not have a big family have you heard? How do you respond?
I'm Jamie, and I want to help you afford a beautiful life with your family. 
Ah, the overpopulation problem. Yeah, China tried to work on that. Kind of backfired on them a bit. xD
So far as what other people will think…I think we put too much weight into what others think. Be it living up to Facebook or Pinterest standards of what we think others expect of us, or things from the media telling us what we should or shouldn’t do, or the random stranger in the grocery store with the “my, your hands are full” snark. And don’t we all kind of hate that anyway, so why do we even listen to it any more?! 😀
I’m an only child, and I had a fine time growing up. But siblings would have been nice (heck, I might have more social skills, had I had siblings xD ). And I have known plenty of people who love their siblings a ton, be it having one sibling or four. I would much rather parents decide how many children they could have based on their capacity to love them versus any other reason.
Hahah great post thanks for linking with #ShowcaseTuesday
Thanks for hosting!
LOVE THIS!!!! Now I want another baby… 😉
Funnnny! I can’t believe the rude things people say on a regular basis *shakes head*
I actually kind of love that you tell kids no to snacks sometimes…. it is strange to me that in our culture, a child saying they want food seems to OBLIGATE the parent to give it to him/her. I read a book about French parenting, and the author credited a lot of successful dinnertimes (kids sitting the whole time, eating what their parents were eating, etc) on the fact that they don’t generally eat snacks at all. I think it is very healthy to teach a kid that just because they have an urge (such as to eat in between meals) doesn’t mean it MUST be gratified.
Just going off of my observations as a kindergarten teacher… no kids of my own yet… and lest I sound like a horrible person, I’m a firm believer in snacks when the time / activity level / nutritional content make it worthwhile. 😉
The overpopulation stuff is just a fallacy. If you are in a 3rd world country where the average family has 6-9 kids then yes that makes sense. But if you are in a developed country where the average family is less than 2 kids and your countries retirement plans are hurting because each generation is smaller than the last, then it doesn’t make sense.