These steps help you learn how to afford being a stay at home mom…and if that’s really what you want the most!
I proudly watched as my Hubby crossed the stage wearing his cap and gown.
It was tough work to put him through college while we both worked full-time jobs and raised our son, but it paid off!
A week after the celebration, I gave birth to our second boy. As I held him, one thought ran through my head over and over.
I have to figure out how to afford to be a stay at home mom!
But we just weren’t in a position to make it happen yet. I had to be content with a long summer off from my teaching job with my boys instead.
By the time I was pregnant with our third child, we knew it was time to get serious about making my dream a reality.
I wasn’t good at juggling work and home life. And that paycheck I was earning was barely covering the costs of my work.
I was due in June, so we had an entire school year to make our preparations.
Today, I’m going to share with you how we made the leap.
How to Be A Stay At Home Mom On One Income
1. Want It the Most
This sounds silly, but it’s the most important step. How much do you want to be a stay at home mom?
Is it more important than owning the latest gadgets? If you refuse to do without cable tv or make other sacrifices, that’s ok.
But it’s important to admit it before you quit your job and go into debt.
Living a champagne lifestyle on a Coke budget doesn’t work.
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Some people don’t want to afford it. Be honest with yourself. If you don’t really want to be a stay home mom, that’s ok. If everyone was the same, life would be boring.
2. Get Out of Debt
Next, get completely out of debt. Imagine the wiggle room you’d have in your budget if you were debt free!
You’ll probably still have a mortgage and maybe some other bills to pay (if you can afford that on one salary).
Now, getting totally out of debt might be a tall order.
Just remember that the more payments you can eliminate, the better you’ll do on one salary.
3. Learn How Much Your Job Is Costing You
You probably know that you have to reinvest some of your paycheck back into your job. But do you know how much?
Expenses like these can cut your income dramatically:
- Childcare (If you’re expecting your first, you’ll want to price this to help you make your decision.)
- Transportation: This includes a whole list of things from gas to parking passes to owning a second vehicle. Some choose to do without a second car so that Mom can stay home. Not driving to work will save you a good chunk of change by itself.
- Food: I don’t know about you, but when I was a working mom we ate out a lot. I was too tired to cook most days. I also bought expensive convenience foods. Most of this can be cut out in favor of simple meals when you are home. I’m not promising you won’t be tired! But being home gives you the ability to throw food in the crock pot anytime during the day.
- Clothing: You might need to buy a uniform, nice work clothes, or specific materials that help you with your job. The good news is that the stay at home mom uniform is whatever you want it to be!
- Dues/Fees: If you plan to go back to work at some point, you’ll want to do your best to keep up with certificates and licenses to make that an easy transition. But you may find that you can eliminate dues or fees to certain organizations and groups while you are staying home.
4. Try Living On One Income
Once you decide to make that dream of staying home a reality, whatever paychecks you bring home should automatically become “extra money”.
(Might as well get used to living on one salary ASAP, right?)
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If you have no debt, put that money into savings. You’ll want a cash cushion before you put in your notice.
5. Embrace Frugality
You’ve worked it out and have a plan for staying home. Great!
But if you want to continue to stay home (rather than scrambling to find another job to keep up your lifestyle) you’ll need to embrace frugality.
The word frugal has taken on a negative feeling, but it really shouldn’t be that way.
To me, being frugal isn’t about cutting corners and being cheap. I’d define it as being extremely intentional with your money.
For instance, frugal people save up to buy a quality item rather than grabbing the cheapest one (and then having to buy it again a few months later when it breaks).
Get tons of frugal living tips here.
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6. Consider Work At Home Jobs
If you do your calculations and find that you’re still coming up a little short, try to make up the difference with a work at home job.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’ll be able to get a lot of work done while you’re home with the kids.
That magical nap time isn’t a guarantee.
Rather, look at your schedule and see if there’s a time that your partner can watch the kids while you work.
The beauty of most work at home jobs is that they’re flexible. You can work whenever you can fit it into your schedule. But you do have to be able to get it done! So be realistic.
Try this free ebook to see if it’s something you might be good at.
Follow these steps and you’ll see just how to afford being a stay at home mom.
Our third baby was born in late June.
And, because we followed this plan, I was able to give my notice just a few days later.
I’ve been a stay at home mom for ten years now, and I’ve never regretted it. If you share this dream, I encourage you to give it all you’ve got!
Looking for ways to save more money?
Are you a stay home mom, or do you want to be? What have you done to make that dream come true?
I'm Jamie, and I want to help you afford a beautiful life with your family. 
I’ve been a SAHM for a little over a year now. We tried to live on one income before I left my job and that was a big help. It is such a blessing to be home with my children, and I try to appreciate it every day!
Love this! You are right, most people who say that can’t afford it, aren’t willing to make the financial sacrifices it takes to be a stay at home mom. I wouldn’t trade it for the world though! Staying home with my kids is way better than new clothes and other stuff I don’t need!
For sure!
I love this post because I really do wonder how people afford to stay home! And I STILL wonder that even after being a stay at home mom myself for over a year now! You have a lot of solid advice here – especially “want it the most” and “don’t fool yourself into thinking you will get a lot of work done from home with kids around!” SO TRUE!
“Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’ll be able to get a lot of work done while you’re home with the kids” – YES! SO TRUE!!! 🙂
So much great advice here Jamie! 🙂
Very well put together Jamie! Becoming a sahm is a very personal decision, and with proper planning it can be accomplished. Great advice!
Joyful Savings recently posted this article you might enjoy: Hacks You’ll Absolutely Love!
That is definitely one thing I wish we didn’t have so much of: debt! But, even with one income, we manage. With the costs of daycare nowadays, I feel like it costs MORE to work than be a stay at home parent, personally. 🙂
I wish we didn’t have debt now, too. We started well! I’ve considered going back to work a time or two, but you’re right. By the time you account for daycare it just isn’t worth it.
This is all very good advice, Jamie!
I think part of wanting it more than anything means being willing to go without luxuries like eating out often and buying new clothes. We almost always eat at home and shop for used clothes in order to save money to live on one income.
Great thoughts, Jamie! I’ve been blessed to be a stay-at-home mom for 20 years, enjoying freelance editing from home while homeschooling my four daughters. Even with the side income, we’ve made (and are still making!) numerous sacrifices… you absolutely can’t have a “champagne lifestyle on a Coke budget.” I’m sharing your post to encourage other moms–it’s not easy staying home and cutting expenses, but it is so worth it. Plus, I prefer water anyway. 🙂
Being a stay at home mom would be my ultimate dream come true! There is no way we could pay our rent without my salary, though. I do get to work from home two days a week, though that is almost the worst of both worlds sometimes with all that motherly guilt of not focusing in the kids when I’m with them. But your tips are all wonderful, Jamie. Good for you to have done the hard stuff to made it work, and to offer inspiration to others. I don’t know any mom who doesn’t want to be at home with her kids, at least for a while.
Absolutely. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that you don’t love your kids and want to be with them if you choose to work. I just think it’s important to be honest about whether you truly want to be a full time stay at home mom.
And some women are willing to jump through all of these hoops and still can’t make ends meet enough to stay at home with their kids. It’s a sad truth sometimes.
It’s true you have to make sacrifices if you want to stay at home with the kids. After we had our third, my husband begged me to quit my job and stay home, and I reluctantly agreed. We’ve made it work, but not without sacrifices. My husband has two jobs and he works long hours. Also, I’ve had to come up with ways to stretch our budget and we keep luxuries (such as eating out, shopping sprees, and expensive vacations) to a minimum, but that doesn’t mean we don’t get quality family time in. I’ve always liked to work, but I must admit that my kids benefit greatly from having me at home, and that’s the greatest reward there is.
Your tips are right on, Jamie! I’ve been a stay at home mom for 15 years and agree with all of your great advice.
“Want It The Most” – this is so true. I don’t think everyone that says they want it really does want it and, like you say, that’s okay. It’s definitely not for everyone. When I quit working, it was because I wanted it soooo bad it hurt. Plus, childcare costs were eating into my income enough to make it not worth it. But, oh how we became very suddenly frugal by necessity (and have continued live a frugal lifestyle we love)!
Before we started living on one income we put as much of my salary into my 401K as I could up to the legal limit for 6 months. My company matched a part of it so that was a nice bonus.
And, you are right, not every Mom wants to stay home and that is absolutely okay too.
Thanks for partying with us every week on #FridayFrivolity
I am so lucky to be able to stay home with my kids. It’s not easy though!
Have you linked up at #bloggerspotlight yet? It’s open until Tuesday night!
Great advice – especially about working from home to make up the difference. I think some people see the amount they need and think they could never quit their job, but sometimes you just need a little bit to make it work and if you think a little outside the box, you can get there.
Great tips – we were thrown into living on one income and, I’m not gonna lie, it was just horrendous at first. I think if doing your best to live off one if you plan to stay home is such a good idea, it can be a much bigger change than you think! #FridayFrivolity
I love your point about wanting it the most – that’s what helps when it just keeps getting harder and harder on one paycheck!
Absolutely! It’s a tough road sometimes, but I wouldn’t trade it. 🙂
Great tips Jamie! I love the part of the test period to see if you can do this. The sacrifices are well worth the blessings you get by being a stay at home mom. Sometimes you can still have what you want you just need to think about it differently. In the end it may be used instead of brand new. You may have to make it with one car instead of two and take the hubby to work if you need to. It’s just takes a little more effort.
It definitely takes some sacrifice. But it’s worth it!