I won’t lie. Paying off a lot of debt can be a brutal process. But you’ll find a strange strength in the middle of your journey. Learn how to get it done here.
I think it was the open window that did it.
My daughter and I were sitting down to play cards. (She’s becoming quite the card player at the age of 7. We may have a card shark on our hands!)
It was a pretty hot day, so we were spending the afternoon inside.
We aren’t real big on air conditioning here. Our old drafty house doesn’t usually get too hot, so an open window or two is good enough for me and the kids.
But since Hubby spends his day in an air conditioned building and then rides home in an air conditioned car, the house doesn’t feel cozy to him when he finally gets home.
So I try to turn on our window units and close up the house a little before he leaves the office.
On this day, I started the air and then did some chores. When I sat down to play cards and noticed that the window was still open, I closed my eyes and let out a big sigh.
Money was floating right out the window, and I had no one to blame but myself.
The Brutal Truth About Paying Off A Lot of Debt
Guys, we are in month number 19 of paying off debt.
Our fight against debt is the age of a toddler. It would be running around the house, climbing on tables and trying to put forks into outlets if it were a child.
Maybe that’s why it’s so exhausting.
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When you’re paying off debt on full blast, it kind of consumes you. You have to be ever vigilant about money leaks so you can keep all of the cash flowing towards debt.
A constant “thanks for giving us all that stuff (whatever it was) a bunch of years ago” gift to the credit card companies.
Our #yearofno battles have got us to this point. We’re finally down to credit card debt in 4 digits, a mile marker that seemed far off a year ago. It’s a nice place to be (in comparison).
And if we were DINKs (dual income, no kids), that kind of cash would be simple to come up with. But soon, all 5 kids will need new shoes.
Then we’ll be paying the fees that come with the start of another school year.
Getting debt free on one income (albeit, a decent income compared to some!) while raising five kids ain’t for the weak.
The Truth About Paying Off A Lot of Debt
So back to that open window. It highlighted a fact that I haven’t really faced head on yet. A light bulb moment. This debt looms over us at all times.
It’s in the small steps we take (or don’t take…hello, guilt) every day that move us a step closer to debt freedom. Steps like avoiding the a/c or choosing cheaper meals.
It’s in the no’s that are less and less spoken around here. The kids have learned that our hands are tied when it comes to most spending.
We’re still taking care of their needs, of course. There are still occasional surprise splurges. (We did pause our extra payments to take a beach vacation last month.)
But most of the fun activities their buddies get to enjoy, we have to skip.
It’s in the sobs over a garbage bag of toys when I realize that the kids never cared much for them anyway. All of those Christmases and birthdays…some of which we’re still paying on…wasted.
Wasteful.
My fault.
Why didn’t we start this years ago? Why did it take so long to see what was happening?
But even more, it makes me realize that we have to win this fight now and permanently.
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Paying off debt is far more than a snap decision to send in a payment.
It’s a decision you have to make over and over again. Every time there’s a temptation to spend that money in a more fun way, you have to stick to the plan.
You must know the difference between need and want.
This blog has been a fantastic tool for me, because it’s my teacher, my diary, my accountability partner, and my best hope for helping our cause.
When I have to make a decision, I consider how it’s going to look in a 5 Ways We’ve Saved Money This Week post or a monthly update.
Occasionally, I make some extra money from blogging that goes towards our debt.
But I hope the version of our debt fight here at Medium Sized Family hasn’t simplified the struggle too much. I try to keep things positive and encouraging!
Motivating and pushing you to escape the heavy chains of debt is one of my main goals. This post isn’t some admission that everything I’ve said until now has been a lie or somehow wrong.
Just that it’s downright hard.
If paying off debt feels discouraging to you, know that you’re not alone.
Sticking with the fight month after month isn’t glamorous. It’s lonely sometimes, even with the best support systems of family and friends.
But when it feels like we’ll never get to the end of the tunnel, I renew my energy by imagining doing the things I’d like to do debt free.
Taking a child to see a museum exhibit he’d love.
Giving money freely to someone in need without worrying that I’ll bounce a check.
Catching up on house projects without paying double the price in interest.
Struggling against temptation and discouragement day after day isn’t easy for anyone.
But the change you’ll create for your family is worth it.
Keep fighting the good fight.
Get extra help in your fight against too much debt!
Accountability
If you like the idea of having public accountability and creating a tribe of people who think like you do, why not start your own blog?
This idea isn’t for everyone, but I’ll be the first to tell you that my blog has been the key to keeping me on track throughout our debt free journey.
Read 14 Ways to Stay Motivated While You Get Out of Debt when you’re feeling discouraged.
And here’s more help when you feel like giving up.
Weekly Encouragement
Join the Medium Sized Family newsletter for weekly encouragement and extra money saving tips. (Not to mention access to free resources!)
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Have you ever paid off a ton of debt? How did you get through it?
I'm Jamie, and I want to help you afford a beautiful life with your family. 
Jamie, this is an incredible powerful piece. Paying down debt isn’t easy. It sparks all kinds of not so fun emotions….regrets, impatience, guilt, frustration.
And you chose it, and that can make it harder for a while. Especially when you’re pretty sure there are folks around you who just…live in debt.
But you’ve also chosen the Future your debt repayment will bring. You’re so close to being able to do other things with that money you’ve been putting toward all those things you bought before. Lightening the load a little, and maybe investing some so that compounding works for you instead of against you.
Take care. Have hope. Be brave.
Thanks for your encouragement! We are so looking forward to investing, and that’s another thing that keeps us going. I guess seeing how compound interest works against us makes us want to use it for good instead.
Oh, man. I know. When I was living with $48,000 of student loan debt over my head, I couldn’t do ANYTHING without thinking about it. Paying it off was exactly like what you say: a decision you make every day, over and over again. I’ve found that saving money is like that, too, except not as anxiety-inducing. That shadow of debt can cause such anxiety and stress. You’re making huge strides.
I think it’s the deadline that does it to me. I know I can save money any day and it will always be a bonus, but paying off debt means that every minute that money is working against you. And when you finally cross the finish line, you’re just done paying it off!
This is so true! I have an almost insurmountable (seeming) debt and it really does invade your mind, all the time. Do I want some frozen yogurt? Yes, but I could put that $5 to my debt! I like the Churchill quote – I know he meant it about something else, but it applies to debt too! 🙂
Heck, I even feel guilty about grabbing one of those 50 cent Frosties from Wendy’s! My Hubby teases me about it, but I’m just so.done.with.debt. Anyway, I’m cheering for you!
Whenever someone pays off a debt I feel like my side won the game. 🙂
I feel the same as you about feel about spenting 50 cent.
My husband says i worry to much about it
I don’t think it’s healthy to live that way all the time. I hope I remember to relax about it once we’re done with this debt! It’s tough to get away from that mindset sometimes.
Four-digit debt: wow, I can’t wait until we’re at that point. Congratulations on making it so far in this debt payoff journey, and thanks for the encouragement and inspiration.
Thank you! I remember thinking that number seemed so far away. I hope we can get rid of it faster than I have calculated.
19 months of day in, day out fighting debt is a long time, and that’s not easy! But I know you can do it. It’s hard when the regrets and the guilt seem overwhelming, but the past is done and can’t be changed. I encourage you to think about now, about your progress so far, and about the future, getting to where you want to be. And thank you for being real about the struggle…it’s not always “sunshine and frugality”, but it’s about making progress.
This blog was shared with us at just the right time… we are 14 months away from being debt free and I plan to religiously read your blog! Thanks for the encouragement 😀
Thanks so much for that! I hope you find the encouragement you need here. I’m cheering for you!
congrats on having the cc debt down to 4 digits! one thing that has helped me with child-rearing costs was opening summer fund (credit union) where you put in X amount each paycheck then its released in a month during summer for use without penalty. first it covered additional costs with summer camp/day care. then as she got older it was the summer fun fund since I needed to keep her busy. Now it covers school year preparations (i.e., school clothes, bus pass, pe clothes and yearbook). It’s always been a life saver to me. Following.
The whole thing that drew me into this post was how much I can relate to your air conditioner story. I love that I’m not the only one who really focuses on those little things like shutting the door when the AC is running or unplugging my TV before I leave for work in the morning. Paying off debt is a long journey and I’m ready to really buckle down and start doing it. So happy I found your blog today!
Yeah!! I’m so happy you’re digging into your debt. You can totally do it!
Jamie,
You folks are doing amazing! Roll that snowball baby! Your words are so powerful here. Debt is a huge stressor, and I look forward to congratulating you on your success in becoming debt-free.